My name is Lauren, i'm 18 and I live on the south coast of the UK. My ask box is always open.Hope is the only thing stronger than fear.

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Ten Things I Know to Be True:
1. I have tried to die more times than I’d like to admit.
2. I think there is a reason why I keep failing. (I really hope there is a reason why I keep failing.)
3. I think maybe it’s not because I’m bad at dying, but because I’m really good at surviving.
4. Opening my veins did nothing to let the sadness out of me.
5. Being physically empty did not make me feel any less emotionally empty.
6. Deciding to get better was the hardest decision I’ve ever made.
7. Deciding to get sick again was the easiest.
8. I am not a soldier in this illness. I do not have to die for my cause.
9. I have shaky hands and weak knees, but that does not mean I am not strong.
10. I am not worthless.
Casey Shanahan (via adderalldust)

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Posted September 2 with 17,043 notes


what beautiful weather outside im gonna close the curtains

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Posted September 2 with 309,178 notes
I wish I hadn’t shown you the darkest parts of me. I Would Take it All Back (#616: July 21, 2014)

(Source: write2014, via theonlyarboretictruth)

Posted September 2 with 34,304 notes
This morning I woke up and decided to tell the truth.
I am not okay, and I don’t think that any of us are,
and I don’t think that we need to apologize for it.
Friends call to make plans and I say yes,
instantly regretting it. If it’s not alcohol,
it’s getting high, it’s music so loud my bones hum.
It’s driving around and making promises with our pinkies
or throwing up on the side of the street or kissing
each other so violently that we’re swallowing hair,
wisdom teeth. It’s loneliness so deep in my stomach
it’s in my womb and kneecaps. I’m writing this because
I fucking want you to feel something. I want you to
sweat me out like a fever. Okay, okay, listen:
I want to be a new girl but it’s these old habits.
We’re all so warm and feeling and I can’t quite
get this taste out of my mouth. We fling love around
like we don’t expect to get it back. It feels like
only yesterday my mother was kissing my scrapes
and bruises. Only yesterday I was learning to tie my shoes,
snap my fingers, be trusted with the delicate task
of dressing myself. I don’t think it’s safe here anymore.
Empty out your chest and get ready to run.
Kristina Haynes, “May 2014” (via fleurishes)

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Posted September 2 with 6,134 notes
You’re not a bad person for the ways you tried to kill your sadness. Unknown (via blackbruise)

(Source: bratsquad, via another--empty--bottle)

Posted September 2 with 149,855 notes
I just want everything that I deserve because I’ve dealt with everything I didn’t deserve… (via itsannaliousbabe)

(via theonlyarboretictruth)

Posted September 2 with 1,510 notes
Baby I understand that some nights sadness will hit you like a tidal wave and there is no way to stop it or tell when it is coming. I understand how hard it is to keep from drowning. But I need you to understand this. When you are sad, I will call you and read you parts of my favorite book so that for a little while you can leave this life and feel like you’re someone else. When you are too sad to even speak I’ll sit there with you and listen to you breathe and memorize your heartbeat. And when you tell me that you need me, I will already be on my way to you. And if you want to cry, I will hold you all night. And if you want to laugh, I will bring your favorite comedy over and I will watch it with you and fall in love with your tear filled eyes every time the tv lights them up. If you want to be alone, I will give you space. But I will come back in the morning and tell you how beautiful you are and that I’m so happy you made it through the night. I will hold your hand and tell you that tonight will be better. And I’ll do everything I can to try and make that happen. So it’s okay to be sad, because I will always be here to make you happy again.

(via the-faults—in-myself)


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Posted September 2 with 11,689 notes
It is not people
or purpose
but life’s simple
pleasures; hot coffee,
a soft bed, a
quiet walk in a forest,
that save us in the end.
Beau Taplin || life’s simple pleasures.  (via afadthatlastsforever)

(via masterfulmelody)

Posted September 2 with 782 notes